Monday, 23 November 2009

Life Lesson #75 - Don't Sit Infront Of Sleeping Men On Coaches

Note To Self: When there is a man sleeping behind you on a coach, make sure not to put your head all the way back on the seat. I found this out the hard way when going home on Friday as the man behind (who was snoring loudly enough to give Siddle a run for her money) unconciously grabbed my head and decided to rest his hand on the back of my seat for the next five minutes. I jumped when he did it too, causing me to involuntarily throw my MP3 played into the lap of the guy sat next to me. Needless to say, it was an awkward three hours sat in a silence tainted with humiliation... Finally escaped when we got into Bradford and hopped on a bus home, only to listen to the conversation of two old men and eventually come to the conclusion that they had a more exciting life than me. One of them even went as far to say that every single night was a great night, going out with his friends and drinking ale. It sounded good to me, he's on the right track.
I went out for lunch on Saturday with Kez and some of her friends, and we went to see New Moon, which is amazing. Edward looks beautiful, Jacob has nothing on him. I think I got a bit too excited though, and my mind was elsewhere all day - more specifically when I left my bank card in the machine in Cineworld and only realised when the film had finished and we were halfway to the carpark. Thankfully, a good samaritan had handed it in and I was reunited with my money, which I was glad about. I wasn't so glad about the bus journey to Paul's house later on, complete with two really annoying chavs who got off at the same stop and kept calling me a 'fucking goth' and asking me if I had my nipple pierced... God knows. I don't think I have ever been happier to see Paul's mum put her head out of the window and come let me in. The night got better from then on, or rather, worse if we're talking in terms relative to alcohol. Within the space of a few hours, I was completely wankered, sat with Lauren and Kel watching Paul sing Cherly Cole on karaoke, and locking myself in the bathrooms for ten minutes because I was scared I had gone into the mens and was afraid to come out incase I was right. Personally, I blame the Tesco's own brand of RedBull we had been drinking beforehand. Apparently, there was 'A Change In The Name, But The Kick Stays The Same!' - not sure what it was meant to be similar to, but it certainly wasn't RedBull. The rest of the night is rather vague, although I do recall ringing Jayne and sending her numerous texts, probably about house rabbits (I'm trying to convince everyone to let me get one for the house, they are amazing, they walk around your house and sit on your sofa like a cat - but they're rabbits!). Then I found Kezia and we decided that if we walked to Morrisons and got a taxi from there, it would be a lot cheaper. Which it was, only we would have to walk forever, and through the prostitute area of Thornton Road, which wouldn't really be that fun... Still, taxi only cost £5.50 - bargain! Totally worth it. Made myself an egg mayonnaise sandwich when I got home to celebrate.
Currently sat at my computer desk trying and failing to write my essay. Definitely starting to feel like I was not cut out for academia. Me and Jayne had a conversation before about how we could stop going to university and just sign on instead. We wouldn't have to get up, or do stupid essays or presentations, we would never be stressed, and we could just "eat and watch New Moon, all day, every day". Sounds a beautiful life, doesn't it?

No comments: